You’re Cordially Invited to the Perfectly Choreographed Goop Ball

beyonce, blankstareblink.com

If you follow Blank Stare, Blink on Instagram, you would have seen the lovely sketches that our own Paula Mangin did of some of the red-carpet celebrities who attended this year’s Met Gala. Rihanna, Sarah Jessica Parker, Beyoncé with Jay Z, Kimye, Lena Dunham, Reese Witherspoon. You get the idea. It’s that kind of event. Biggest night of the year in Fashion for Fashion and Hollywood’s Elite, orchestrated by Vogue’s Anna Wintour and a coveted ticket for anyone who’s anyone. Meaning not us.

And also not, apparently, Gwyneth Paltrow. She was an attendee at last years Punk: Chaos to Couture, but after her dis of the event that went something like, “I’m never going again. It was so un-fun…It was boiling. It was too crowded. I did not enjoy it at all,” she was dis-invited to this year’s celebration of Charles James: Beyond Fashion. Ouch? Or Not? Charles James was a master architect of couture, engineering the first, and smartest looking puffer jacket known to exist, and intricate gowns that sometimes weighed 12 pounds, but felt more like two.

I often wonder what it’s like to be one of the chosen? I’ve never been popular, courted, wanted, or in-vogue. I would give just about anything to be Cinderella for just one night. But Gwyenth flipped the bird to Anna Wintour, The Costume Institute and the Met Ball in one fell (well-manicured, finger-waving) swoop.

To up the ‘dis’ ante, Gwyneth comically chose the date of the Met Gala to open her first brick and mortar, pop-up Goop store. I’m sure you know, but if you don’t, goop.com is Gwyneth’s lifestyle website where she aims to “share all of life’s positives” and “to become the most trusted girlfriend on the web.” Those are Gwyneth’s words. She’ll supply you with perfect recipes, perfect dresses, and perfect ideas on how to put your perfect kids to bed perfectly. It’s Gwyenth’s world and we can now shop in it.

Screw you, Met Gala. Your party sucks and I’ll get more press by opening a pop-up shop then attending your sweaty and boring ball.

That’s darn brilliant and strategic marketing on her part. But Gwyneth’s perfectly curated lifestyle and taste is not something I’m sure she’d want me invited to.

But in I go anyway. The green malachite box atop the Paltrow-authored books may cost a cool $1,200, but it also comes with Gwyneth’s approval! Judging by the hordes of GOOPites shopping in the store, that’s worth it’s weight in gold. Sold!

I guess we have more in common than I realize. I mean, we were both dis’d by the Met. But she did something about it.

goop pop-up shop, blankstareblink.com


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